


Remember

by leejenowo



Series: Ships that should sail [2]
Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Coma, Everyone Is Gay, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Polyamory, hyuck is idk, i still cant tag, kissing is nice, mark is also confused, renjun is confused, theres no markrenhyuck tag???, this is markrenhyuck bwitches, um i tried to describe kissing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-28
Updated: 2018-07-28
Packaged: 2019-06-17 11:58:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,448
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15460878
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/leejenowo/pseuds/leejenowo
Summary: What happens when there's an accident and Mark forgets who he truly loves?





	Remember

**Author's Note:**

  * For [angeIsan](https://archiveofourown.org/users/angeIsan/gifts).



> I wrote this instead of my AU on twitter or the Maze sequel... Yeah... Speaking of the Maze sequel, i have 3 chapters written now and im trying to write as much as i can before college starts again. Hopefully i can manage 6 or 7 chapters before that. Also thank you to miss Amy, my love, for beta-ing this. She's also the one who's beta reading the Maze sequel. Thank you my love uwu

There was an accident on set. That’s what the official statement SM put out said. It had the internet going wild in just a matter of hours. SM’s public relation team wrote a lengthy explanation about what happened: one of the light fixtures the art director had installed on the set for NCT Dream’s newest music video had fallen. How it had happened? No one really knew. But they said one member was hit and had to be rushed to the hospital. They didn’t say which one and everyone was worried about who it could be. 

It didn’t take long for fans to figure out that it was Mark, despite the persistent silence from every NCT member. Fans started sending gifts to the hospital Mark was in as well as the dorms, and NCT’s management had to tell them to stop. Mark was in a coma. He couldn’t consume any of the food sent to him or read any of the ‘get well soon’ cards people had written for him.

The members took turns visiting him. They had established a strict schedule for each day of the week, since they would eventually have to participate in individual or group activities again. From Monday to Friday, the members visited him in trios: Taeyong, Jungwoo and Chenle on Monday; Ten, Yuta and Yukhei on Tuesday; Taeil, Jeno and Kun on Wednesday; Sicheng, Doyoung and Jaemin on Thursday and Johnny, Jaehyun and Jisung on Friday. Some of the small groups were weird, pairings fans would probably never imagine, but it gave the members the opportunity to spend time together and talk freely with each other while they watched over Mark.

The only exception was on Saturday. It was the day where Renjun and Donghyuck would both visit Mark together. At first, Donghyuck thought it was a bit awkward to talk to his boyfriend while their friend was there, so he had asked the managers if he could visit alone on Sundays. But the managers had refused, saying Sunday would be a time for all the members to get together and take a break. They had no dance practice, no vocal training, no schedule at all. So Donghyuck went with it and visited Mark, accompanied by Renjun. It was weird at first, talking to someone who was never answering while your friend listened to everything you said. Before leaving, Donghyuck would always lean in and kiss Mark’s forehead and tell him he loved him before saying goodbye. But after 3 months of getting no answers, Donghyuck felt like his ‘i love you’s would never be answered again. He didn’t think Mark would wake up again. And if he did wake up, how much would he remember? Would he remember his boyfriend? So on one Saturday, Donghyuck stayed home and cried in his bed instead of going to the hospital with Renjun.

Renjun understood it, at least he thought so. He would be scared too if he had a boyfriend and had to watch him go through something like this. None of the members were mad at the Jeju boy for not wanting to visit Mark anymore and they understood that he needed a bit of time to think about what could possibly happen if Mark was to wake up with his memory impaired. All of them had thought about it, even Renjun, although he hated the possibility. 

That day was just another Saturday afternoon for Renjun as he made his way to the seventh floor of the hospital. He was accustomed to the long trek up the countless flights of stairs, but he refused to use the elevator. It gave him some time to think about what he would say to Mark. At first, when Donghyuck’s absence was still fresh, Renjun would share a bit of what he did during the week so Mark would still know. Not all of the members believed he could hear what was being said while he was in a comatose state, but Renjun did and he thought that telling Mark about their everyday life would just help him keep up with what was going on, should he wake up. But his life wasn’t that interesting. It was nearing the fifth month since Mark had slipped into his deep sleep and life for NCT had started going back to normal. Renjun had been visiting Mark alone for almost 2 months now and he rarely talked about Donghyuck now. He barely saw him as he was preparing for a comeback with the other 127 members. 

NCT Dream’s comeback had been postponed indefinitely, their activities coming to a full stop after Mark’s accident, as did every unit’s. Gradually, the members started going back to their usual personal schedules: Jaehyun and Johnny on NCT’s Night Night, Jeno’s MC position, NCT 127’s comeback preparation… The others didn’t really mind not having anything to do and they would use the alone time to work on other things or just take a break. But Renjun didn’t know what to do. He was stuck between Donghyuck who tried to drown himself in work, practicing for hours on end without stopping, just so he could forget about Mark being in a coma and himself. He didn’t know what to do. He didn’t know what to tell Mark. He didn’t know what to tell Donghyuck. He didn’t know what to tell the other members. He was just so confused about everything.

So today, his mind was blank as he made his way up to Mark’s room. It was still blank when he sat in one of the chair someone had pulled close to Mark’s bed. It was still blank when he started talking to the boy on the bed, words finding their way out of his mouth without him really knowing what he was saying.

“Mark,” a long pause, Renjun grabbed Mark’s hand in his before continuing, “I don’t know what I’m doing… I don’t know if what I’m doing is right or wrong. How did you do it? It seemed so easy when it was you. You’re not here anymore and I just don’t know what to say to the other members.”

Renjun knew he was rambling, but it’s not like Mark would tell him to stop. So he kept going as he let his head fall on the bed, close to their intertwined fingers.

“I don’t want to do it anymore, Mark. I’m not made for this. It’s not the same without you… I miss you. Mark, I want you- no, we want you to come back to us. Please…”

If Renjun hadn’t focused all his attention on Mark at that moment, hoping for a miracle, he would have missed the way the older’s fingers slightly twitched or how his eyes moved under his closed eyelids. They didn’t open, but it was a start.

\---

Everything happened really fast after that. Renjun had called a nurse in, who had in turn called Mark’s doctor in. After checking Mark’s monitors and looking at his eyes with the little light they all seem to carry in their pockets (Renjun thought it was only something that was in movies and TV shows) they got ready to bring him for scans and tests Renjun didn’t understand. He stayed in his chair, not truly getting what was happening, but he was hanging on to the chances that Mark might be waking up after 5 long months.

It didn’t occur to him that he should be telling the others about this until his phone vibrated in his pocket. It was a text from Chenle who was asking where he was because it was now 4pm. Usually, he would go back to the dorms at around 3. So, yeah, he had exceeded his visiting time and it wasn’t something he usually did. But he felt like he needed to stay in case the doctor had to talk with someone. Instead of texting Chenle back, he decided to send a quick message to Taeyong (‘I think Mark is waking up’) and went back to patiently waiting for the medical team to wheel Mark’s bed back in the room. His phone started blowing up with texts and calls from all the members, but he answered none of them.

In the end, Mark came back still asleep (although Renjun wished he wasn’t), and the doctor explained that Mark was starting to come back, but that it would take some time. They had no idea if any of his motor or cognitive skills had been impaired in the accident, but they made a list of things that could happen. The only thing Renjun could remember was ‘memory loss’ and he felt like Donghyuck’s worries were funded after all. And if Mark’s motor skills were intact, he would still need to go through physiotherapy sessions because laying in bed for 5 months probably wasn’t good for the body. He would need to build back his muscle mass and start a regular diet. So even after waking up, Mark would need some time to get back on his feet.

It was a tiring day for Renjun and when he went back to the dorm, dodging almost everyone and every question thrown his way. It was a lot of information to process. But still, he couldn’t avoid Donghyuck because the younger guy was laying on his bed, under his covers, crying on his pillow. The Chinese boy wanted to be mad at him because he very well intended on slipping between his sheets and getting comfortable the second he came back home, but seeing Donghyuck’s tear stained cheeks made him falter a bit; he couldn’t just ignore his best friend. So instead of going straight to sleep like he wanted to, he made himself a little spot between the wall and Donghyuck, grabbing onto the boy and turning him around so he was facing him.

He softly wiped his tears away with his thumb, “He’s going to wake up, don’t worry.”

“I know, but I’m still scared,” Donghyuck sniffled a bit, more tears falling, “What if he doesn’t remember me?”

Renjun gulped because he knew it was a possibility, but he still cradled Donghyuck’s head to his chest, letting him cry for as long as he needed to.

\---

Mark had woken up. It was on Wednesday so only Taeil, Jeno and Kun were there at the time it happened, but they had called the others quickly after. The doctor had ordered for only 6 or 7 members maximum to visit him at once as to not overwhelm him too quickly. So on that Wednesday afternoon, Jungwoo, Sicheng and Jaemin joined the other 3, dragging Donghyuck along. The rest stayed home, waiting for their chance to visit Mark. Everything seemed to be going well (Jeno had sent a picture of him poking the heart monitor electrodes on Mark’s chest to see if he would get a shock, which he didn’t), until Donghyuck came back to the dorm. 

Only Jisung, Chenle and Renjun were left in the Dream dorm and they had decided to steal Jeno’s PS4 (yes, Yukhei actually gave it to him, but now he was always in their dorm) to play together. But the sound of the door slamming shut made all head turns in direction of the entrance. Curiosity let place to confusion and surprise when they saw Donghyuck leaning on the door, tears streaming down his face. His legs wobbled under him and he slid all the way down to the floor, before burying his face in his knees.

The trio that was left at home looked at each other. Jisung and Chenle clearly seemed uncomfortable, so Renjun took the decision to drag Donghyuck away and try to console him on his own. It took him all of his strength to get Donghyuck’s ass up from off the floor because it seemed like his friend was doing the most at not helping him and Renjun had to tug him up, complaining about how he just dragged his feet instead of actually walking as they made their way to Renjun’s room.

It took a good 20 minutes before Donghyuck started talking because he seemed inconsolable, even in the privacy of the dorm bedroom. 

“He doesn’t remember me,” were the first words his friend managed to choke out.

Renjun was confused, “But he seemed to remember everyone? Jeno took pictures with him and everything… How could he not remember you?” He didn’t mean to sound insensitive, but he was really curious as to how Mark could have forgotten only one member out of 17.

“No, you don’t understand,” Donghyuck rolled over so he was laying on the side, his face close to Renjun’s thigh as the latter was sitting on the bed with his legs stretched out, “He remembers Haechan, but he doesn’t remember me, Donghyuck. He doesn’t remember us...”

Renjun let out a sound similar to a whine, he felt bad for the younger boy. He didn’t know which words would make it better, if there was even any. Instead of risking saying something wrong, he decided to simply bring Donghyuck’s head on his lap, slowly curling his fingers through his hair.

It turns out Mark had forgotten some things about the months preceding the accident, including his relationship with Donghyuck.

\---

For the next two months or so, Mark was to undergo intensive physical therapy to regain control of his body movements and be able to join NCT again. The other 127 members were still preparing hard for their comeback, so they didn’t have a lot of time to go to Mark’s therapy. It was mostly the other Dream members, minus Donghyuck, who went with Mark to keep him company and on some occasions, Kun, Yukhei, Jungwoo or Ten would also go. 

Mark had been authorized to go back home after a couple of weeks, staying with the Dreamies instead of the 127 members to avoid any ‘environmental stress factors’ as the doctor had put it. That meant no come and go from the members as they attended schedules and practice.

For a while now, Mark had asked Renjun to go with him to every therapy session he had, including the one he had today. Renjun, being the good, supportive friend he is, didn’t question Mark’s intentions until the 45 minutes were over and they were sitting on a bench behind the private clinic where Mark received his treatments.

“You know this was my last time here, right?” Mark questioned as they waited for the manager to pick them up.

Renjun looked at him in surprise, “Is it really? That means you’ll be coming back soon!” In his excitement, Renjun had grabbed on Mark’s hand and didn’t realize it until he saw his friend’s face turn red.

Mark looked at their hands, before turning away slightly, but he made no move to break the contact. He knew his cheeks were burning up, and even if they weren’t, they would be after what he was about to do. Breathing in deeply to collect all the confidence he could, he finally turned back to Renjun.

“Renjun, I have something to tell you,” when he saw his friend open his mouth, Mark was quick to shut him up, “Please don’t interrupt me until I’m done. Then you can do whatever you want.”

A small nod indicated Mark that he could go on, “When I was in a coma, I could hear everything that was said. I can’t remember all the things, thankfully because someone was rambling a lot about what new food he had tried, but some things seemed to have stuck to me, you know? I can’t really tell who was saying what because a lot of the voices seemed muffled and sometimes there was a lot of people in the room. But somehow, I could tell your voice out of all the others. It was loud and clear and it was always there. I had no notion of time when I was asleep, but I always felt like it seemed to slow down when I heard your voice. Everything else seemed like it was sped up, except for you.”

Mark took a pause, because he didn’t know how he could voice what he had to say next.

“I don’t really know how to say this so first, I want you to know that you’re really talented and I know that being an idol is your dream. You shouldn’t give it up. You’re absolutely, fully capable.”

Renjun was touched because Mark remembered something he had said months ago, before he was even awake. But he didn’t interrupt him as he was curious about what Mark was trying to tell him.

“The members told me I used to date Hyuck… But when I woke up, I didn’t love him anymore. I didn’t remember ever loving him. And I think I know why. It’s hard, you know?” He was fidgeting in his seat. No, Renjun did not know what it felt like to forget who you loved. He didn’t even know what love was like. But he still squeezed Mark’s hand in his to keep him going. “I think it’s because… I fell in love with somebody else.”

Renjun was confused now. Who could Mark be in love with after being stuck in a hospital bed for so long? He looked at him expectantly, hoping he would find an answer on his friend’s face. 

But instead of finding an answer, he found more questions in the form of a kiss. 

The feeling of another pair of lips against his own was foreign. He had never been kissed or had never kissed anyone for that matter. But somehow, Mark’s lips were just like the rest of him: warm and inviting. So Renjun found himself inching closer to the older boy, tilting his head to the side a bit (it was something he had seen in movies). Kissing was easier than he thought after all, and with Mark in the lead, he let his lips move freely against Mark’s mouth. He could feel Mark’s hand on his cheek and the way he was squeezing his hand.

At the moment, Renjun thought that kissing Mark was probably the best thing in the world (beside midnight snuggles with his members) and he almost let out an embarrassing whine when his friend pulled away. But the reality of it all was quickly catching up to him.

“We can’t do this, whatever this is, to Donghyuck!” Renjun got up from the bench, frantically pacing back and forth, “You can’t love me, Mark! It will break Donghyuck!”

Mark still looked calm and collected, and Renjun felt he was going to go crazy. How could Mark do this to him and to Donghyuck?

“Please, sit down and let me finish…” The older boy had caught Renjun’s wrist to force him to sit back down beside him. “It’s been a bit over 2 months since I woke up and after I realized how much I hurt Hyuck, I tried really hard to remember how it used to be with him. Most of it were just bits and pieces of memories, but I remembered how we would cuddle and watch movies on Netflix. Sometimes we had food fights too and Taeyong always scolded us for messing up the kitchen. Over time, I managed to get enough informations about our relationship to actually remember everything. I remember dating him and loving him. I still love him...”

“Mark, I’m so confused…” Renjun’s feelings were all jumbled up and he wasn’t sure if he understood what was happening. “Why did you not tell him? Why did you kiss me if you still love him?”

Mark sighed, “I was confused too, you know? When I woke up, I was in love with you. But then I remembered the past Mark, and past Mark is in love with Donghyuck. I didn’t think it was possible at first; to love two people at the same time, I mean. But I looked it up and it’s a thing called polyamory.”

God, Renjun felt like an idiot because he still didn’t understand what Mark was hinting at. The other seemed to notice it and tried to explicitly tell him what he wanted.

“Renjun, I want to date the both of you. At the same time,” he huffed out, “I don’t even know if you like me or if Donghyuck still likes me.”

“Mark, I know Hyuck still likes you. He’s been burying himself in work and practice,” he played with the boy’s fingers before continuing, “I don’t know about me. I’ve never been in love and I don’t know what it feels like. But i liked kissing you. And I’m sure I could fall in love with Donghyuck too.”

Mark was giddy. He never thought that he would hear something like that coming from Renjun (he didn’t even know he could possibly be into guys and had imagined himself getting pushed away multiple times) so he was really excited at the news.

“I’m going to confess to Donghyuck again when we come back to the dorms! And then I’ll come get you and we can talk about it. Or maybe you can come with me and talk together? Or you can come and wait until I call you in? Oh, but what if he says he doesn’t want to talk? What if he doesn’t want me back?” Mark’s brain was going into overdrive and Renjun could barely follow what he was saying. So he kissed him again.

It was like the first time: still warm and oh so familiar. Renjun really thought he would never get over how nice kissing Mark felt. And in the middle of it, he found himself thinking about what kissing Donghyuck would feel like.

They broke away just in time before the manager arrived.

\---

While they were on the road, both boys decided to go at the 127 dorm so they informed the manager of the change in destination. They talked together in hushed voices, making sure the manager couldn’t hear what they were discussing about. The plan was to let Mark go in first and try to patch things up with Donghyuck and then bring Renjun in to discuss the ‘dating arrangements’.

But things didn’t go as planned when they entered the dorm. Sure, Donghyuck was in the room he shared with Jaehyun (they had to unfortunately kick him out), but he was sleeping. After working so hard, he deserved the sleep. But Mark really needed to discuss with him.

His first mistake was to wake the sleeping boy up.

His second mistake was to do it by calling him ‘Hyuckie’. The old nickname he used when they were dating.

The conversation that ensued was less than calm and collected, Renjun could tell that much despite standing on the other side of the door. 

Even Jaehyun was concerned as he peeped from the corner of the hallway, “Should I get Taeyong or Johnny?”

Renjun shook his head, “No. At least, not yet.”

The door suddenly opened and out came Mark. He looked disappointed and guilty.

“He wants to talk to you.”

Renjun quickly got up from the spot where he was sitting and grabbed Mark’s hand in his. You could say the boyfriend instincts jumped out. “Are you ok?”

The other boy nodded, “I’ll go sleep a bit. You can come get me when you’re done talking, yeah?”

Renjun agreed and went into the room.

There, he was met with a crying Donghyuck again. He seemed to only see his friend while he was crying recently. He joined him on the bed and instantly, Donghyuck moved to hit him on the arm, hard.

Renjun cried out in pain, “What the- What was that for?”

“You kissed my boyfriend!” Oh god, Renjun had done it. He made Donghyuck angry.

“I’M SORRY! He’s the one who kissed me!” 

“But did you kiss back?”

The Chinese boy opened and closed his mouth like a fish out of the water, “I- Yes, I did.”

“Then it’s only fair if I kiss his boyfriend,” Donghyuck said, all anger disappearing from his voice.

Renjun looked at him in confusion, “What do-” He was silenced by another pair of lips on his for the second time in the day. 

Kissing Donghyuck was different from kissing Mark. His lips were fuller and smoother (Mark could use some chapstick) and they seemed to fit perfectly between Renjun’s. Mark was slow and careful, but Donghyuck seemed like he wasn’t messing around when Renjun felt his tongue poke at his lips. He tentatively parted them, letting Donghyuck’s tongue meet his and Renjun could swear his soul left his body right then and there. Renjun was out of breath when they parted.

“What… was that for?” Today truly was ‘let’s confuse the hell out of Renjun’ day.

Donghyuck hummed, rubbing small circles on the spot he had hit minutes before, “I think it’s me agreeing to whatever Mark wants to do. I wouldn’t mind dating the both of you. You’re a good kisser, babe.”

Renjun choked on his saliva, “B-babe?”

He looked so cute like this, all flustered, that Donghyuck couldn’t help but peck his lips, “Yeah, babe.”

Renjun nodded to himself before remembering the look on Mark’s face when he came out of the room, “What did you tell Mark? He looked really down when he came out earlier… And the screaming...”

His boyfriend(?) looked at him innocently through his eyelashes, “Nothing… Only that I didn’t know and I would think about it. And I’ve thought about it. I just… Didn’t tell him I was agreeing. Plus, we weren’t screaming, just talking loudly. But that was just acting, I wasn’t actually mad at him. I was happy that he remembered and came back to me.”

Renjun frowned, “So you basically lied to him?”

Donghyuck shook his head and booped Renjun’s nose, “No baby, I don’t lie.”

Babe. Baby. Babe. Baby.

The pet names were all Renjun could think about.

“We need to go see Mark,” was Renjun’s conclusion to the situation.

Donghyuck let him get tugged by Renjun through the hallway, this time willingly, until they reached Mark’s room. True to his words, Mark was inside, sleeping in the middle of his bed. Both boys looked at each other before climbing on each side of the elder. They wrapped their arms around Mark, holding hands on top of his stomach, and tangled their legs all together.

Renjun was the first to speak, “Mark, it’s okay even if you don’t hear us.”

Donghyuck quickly followed, “Because this time, we know you’ll wake up for us.”

And both boys fell asleep in a mess of limbs.

**Author's Note:**

> uhhhhhh idk follow me on twitter im tired its almost midnight my @ is leejenowo


End file.
